Mike was nervous. He was among many guests including Steven Spielberg and Bob Zemeckis who flew to England to meet Princess Diana at a film premier. While they waited in the reception area, the chief of royal protocol prepped the group for their formal introduction. Mike, a Canadian, grew more nervous with each passing minute because he was going to meet his future Queen. This was years before Prince Charles and Princess Diana’s divorce. Mike felt out of place in his starched, rented tuxedo, but he was excited to meet the princess. He began to sweat. While he waited, he quickly downed some beers to calm his nerves. Mike did not get drunk, but drunkenness is not the only consequence of poorly timed beer intake.

Mike stood in the receiving line and watched as Princess Diana spoke briefly with those ahead of him. He kept going over the dos and don’ts in his head as the chief of royal protocol had instructed. He planned to follow the protocols to a tee. He thought the princess looked stunning in her blue silk gown and pearl and diamond jewelry. When it was his turn, Mike spoke briefly with Princess Diana. He had planned to compliment her on her outfit, but in the moment, it slipped his mind. They spoke briefly and she moved on.

Mike was relieved that the receiving line was done. The next task was to sit back, relax, and watch the film. The ushers escorted the royal party to their seats, then came back for the others. Mike had expected to sit at least a row or two behind the royal party. He almost went into cardiac arrest when the usher led him to his seat right beside Princess Diana. Mike thought to himself, “except for the fact that she’s married and is the Princess of Wales, this is practically a date.” Mike could not believe his luck, then he began to sweat again. Before the film began, Princess Diana made small talk with Mike. According to the rules set forth by the chief of royal protocol, Mike could not initiate conversation with the princess, but he could respond; Mike could not rise from his seat until she did; and he could never, ever turn his back toward her. Those rules kept going through his mind.

Finally, the film began. Mike thought he could finally relax, well, as much as one could sitting next to Princess Diana. Just as the film’s opening credits appeared on screen, it hit him. Mike felt the sudden and unmistakable pressure of a full bladder brought on by the beers he drank to calm his anxiety at meeting Princess Diana. “I was a hostage to etiquette,” he said later. He knew Princess Diana would be too polite to speak during the film. What would he say if she did? He could not stand before the princess, and there was no reason for her to stand. Even if she did rise, Mike would have to back away from Princess Diana down the crowded row of royals and other guests. That would not work, either. Mike considered the one other alternative but thought that would have been worse than breaking all the other protocols combined. Mike had no choice but to hold it. He recalled that his “fantasy date with a princess turned into two of the most excruciating hours of my life.” Princess Diana never knew about the dilemma as she watched the premier of “Back to the Future” while sitting beside Mike…Michael J. Fox.

Source: Michael J. Fox, Luck Man: a Memoir, (Hyperion, 2002), 99-100.